Mission! Catch That Pervert! A Rank!
by Hyper Deathray
Summary: Jiraiya has gone too far with his “research”. Now witness Tsunade’s retribution.


**Mission! Catch That Pervert! A-rank!**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto, Kishimoto Masashi does.

**Rating: **PG-13

**Summary: **Jiraiya has gone too far with his "research". Now witness Tsunade's retribution.

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After the death of the Sandaime Hokage, Konoha's spirits were bolstered by the return of two legendary ninja, Jiraiya and Tsunade. Tsunade was immediately chosen as the Godaime Hokage. Under her strong leadership, Konoha began the long process of recovery from its invasion by the Sand and Sound.

Jiraiya…well, after retrieving Tsunade, Jiraiya returned to his book writing, which required above all else frequent flashes of inspiration that only those exquisite forms of the opposite gender could provide, even more so than actual pen and paper. In other words, he was doing nothing constructive other than writing sex stories based on his own wet dreams.

None were spared from his lecherous gaze. Jiraiya's unrivaled peeking techniques kept his hungry eyes fixed on every delectable morsel in the village, and that's when our story begins…

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Tsunade kept her eyes fixed on the desk with her hands clasped in front of her. To a simple observer, it looked as if she was in deep contemplation. However, to those who knew her best, it was obvious that she was contemplating forming the seals for a Katon jutsu so the world in general would shut the hell up. This would explain why Shizune and Tonton had long since left her office.

"That idiot," she muttered hatefully as she glared down at the latest complaint filed against her former teammate. Apparently, _somebody_ had rigged an underwater periscope under one of the bathhouses in the village. Although nobody started naming names yet, the number of people who had the free time and the nerve to risk retribution from a village full of angry kunoichi she could count with a singer finger, the middle finger specifically.

This one would soon wind up in the trash, along with the last couple hundreds before it. Dammit, she had enough paperwork as it was, without reading about Jiraiya's latest immature perversity. And speaking of immaturity, Jiraiya might soon himself on the receiving end of _that_ for once, she thought darkly. She chuckled.

"Operation: Humiliation begins."

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_# 135 Anko: C cup_, Jiraiya gleefully jotted down on his notebook as he peeked through his spyglass at his, um, inspiration. _There's Kurenai-chan with her. Not to worry, Miss Red-eyed #43, I've already got you down. Now Yugao-chan, haven't seen you yet. Lucky girl, you're now #136! _

Oh yes, it was a lucky day for Konoha's Number One Pervert. As he spied on the unsuspecting threesome of beauties bathing together, one could just tell that he'd have sweet dreams tonight. But unknown to him, as he lay on his belly trying to estimate Uzuki Yugao's chest size, he was about to have a very bad day.

"Hey! Ero-sennin!!!"

"Waaaahhh!" Jiraiya dropped the telescope in shock. Goddamned idiot kid!

"Hey, Ero-sennin! Ero-sennin!" The hyperactive blond pouted at the old man with his arms crossed. "What are you doing? Something perverted?"

"None of your business, brat!" Jiraiya shouted back, before realizing that he probably should have said something else.

"I knew it!" Naruto pointed an accusing finger while laughing his ass off. "Just like Ero-sennin."

Really, the kid was impossibly immature sometimes. Although, Jiraiya thought darkly, immaturity was just the kind of punishment the little brat deserved. He wasn't a medical genius like Tsunade, but he did know his share of _interesting_ jutsus, particularly the ones relating to enlarging and shrinking certain body parts, permanently. _You better watch that mouth, kid. If you're insecure about your height now, wait a few years, and I'd **love** to see how you deal with your **length**._

"Anyway," the young ninja continued, totally unaware that his sensei had just contemplated neutering him for eternity, "I've got a jutsu that you just might like to see." Naruto said with a little smirk.

"Oh?" Jiraiya asked dubiously.

"Yeah," Naruto replied with an evil grin. "Watch this! Tajyuu Harem no Jutsu!"

_Isn't that just Kage buushin?_ Jiraiya wondered as the smoke surrounded him. And then the smoke cleared.

"Oh, Jiraiya-sama."

"You look so manly, Jiraiya-sama."

"Please stop looking at me like that, Jiraiya-sama. You're making me blush."

Jiraiya was rendered completely speechless as dozens of hot sexy babes glomped him while saying his name. _What? He mixed the Sexy no jutsu with his Kage buushin? Oh I see! This is ingenious!_

"Naruto, you're truly a genius! Mixing the Sexy no jutsu with Kage buushin to create this." Jiraiya shouted while he drooled with his cheeks blushing furiously. "A+!" Jiraiya praised enthusiastically with two thumbs up and a really perverted looking grin. "So this is your new jutsu and you wanted to share it with your sensei, eh? What's it called?"

All the Naruto-clones turned to face him, a mischievous grin on their perfect faces. "Actually, this isn't it at all." They all said together.

"Eh?" Jiraiya responded with a confused face.

"My actual new jutsu," all the clones responded, their grins growing bigger, "is THIS!" Suddenly, one of the clones gave Jiraiya a huge uppercut, launching him off his feet.

"Omphhh" Jiraiya groaned. What the hell was going on, he wondered before he felt someone hit him again.

"E!"

"Ro!"

"Sen!'

"Nin!"

"Must Pay Combo!" The last clone declared as she punted Jiraiya away. Jiraiya flew through the air like a strange, perverted missile while cursing Naruto's name. And then he landed.

With a big splash.

Between Anko, Kurenai, and Yugao.

"Well if it isn't Jiraiya-sama." Anko purred as she hooked her left arm around Jiraiya's.

"We didn't expect to see _you_ here." Kurenai mirrored Anko on Jiraiya's other side. "Were you peeking at the three of us?"

"Now that's very naughty of you, Jiraiya-sama." Yugao whispered into his ear as she wrapped her arms around his neck from behind. "If you were interested in us, you could've just asked."

"Yeah," Anko growled seductively, "we'd _love_ to get our hands on you."

"Now," Kurenai teased him in a mournful voice, "we'll have to punish you."

_Naruto! _Jiraiya thought furiously. _You think you have balls to betray your sensei like this, eh? That's two more things between your legs that you'll never put to use!_ For a second, Jiraiya thought that he might yet escape from the three dangerous women's' grasp, but the snakes withering and constricting around his waist and the three sets of talons digging cruelly into his buttocks killed his hope. _Too late. I've been **caught**. God save me._

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Tsunade sat behind her desk, her face inscrutable as she looked down on the photo on her desk. Finally, she raised her head and showed a grin from ear to ear full of mirth and satisfaction. "Good job." She cheerfully congratulated, with a big thumbs up.

Anko, Kurenai, and Yugao were a bit taken aback. None of them were used to seeing Tsunade in such good spirits unless she was drunk.

"That idiot," she chortled as she stared down at the photo one more time. It showed Jiraiya tied up from several trees high above the ground. More accurately, it showed him tied up with ropes leaving him spread-eagled and nude in midair, while rather _interesting_ objects was sticking out of his unclothed and extremely red rear end and from his mouth. "Mission accomplished." Tsunade added maliciously. _Dumbass had it coming._

"Hey, what about me?" Naruto butted in on her little parade. Anko, Kurenai, and Yugao all stared down at like he was a total moron. Who in their right mind would try to piss off a woman who could destroy a little castle by herself?

But today, Tsunade could care less about Jiraiya's annoying little student. She only cocked an eyebrow and smirked mirthfully. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten you, Naruto". She raised her right arm, revealing Naruto's little frog purse, now bloated with cash. "Your reward." She said as she tossed it toward Naruto.

"Wow, look at all that cash," Naruto exclaimed. "I love this purse when it's fat. Well, I'm outta here. Bye." And with that, Naruto quickly ran out the office to spend his newly earned cash.

_Kid's not so bad._ Tsunade thought, as she watched Naruto continue to congratulate himself. _Still, he's a little too much like his teacher for comfort, creating a jutsu like that at his age._ _You better not be thinking anything perverted, Naruto._

Naruto snickered to himself as he closed the door behind him. Man, Ero-sennin just looked so stupid when the first clone smacked him. Naruto knew that the old pervert would be mad at him tomorrow, but he wasn't worried a bit. As his left hand unzipped his jacket, he took out Jiraiya's notebook, with all 135 completed entries. Naruto knew the thing would come in handy when he picked it up off the ground. Ero-sennin would be furious, but as long as Naruto had this, the old pervert wouldn't dare touch him.

_Besides, there's something I always wanted to know_, he thought as he flipped through the pages, pausing here and there at interesting bits before finally discovering what he, and most of the village wanted to know, but were too afraid to ask.

_#1. Tsunade: F++ _

Yep, it was all in all, a great day for Naruto.

**End**


End file.
